Well here we are again sitting in the surgery lounge. Patty is having a hysterectomy today and the first part of her reconstruction. The hysterectomy is to help improve her chances at staying disease free. Her original cancer was estrogen positive which means estrogen fuels its growth. Thus by removing estrogen from her body by the hysterectomy there will not be any fuel for this type of tumor. The reconstruction speaks for itself.
We got here at St. Mary's North at 5:35 a.m. They started surgery at 8:00. From what the docs say it will take anywhere from 4-6 hours. I'm sitting in the surgery lounge on the 2nd floor waiting it out. You can email me at swarwick@mercy.com if you have any questions. Please be lifting Patty up in prayer!
Friday, January 23, 2009
Monday, October 20, 2008
We're Still Here!
I want to apologize to all of you who have faithfully visited the site for updates on Patty and our family. Not posting is a good thing because that means that for the most part things are going well. Not posting also is a bad thing because it means I don't have the time to post. I love to write but this year my work has zapped every ounce of energy outside my allotment for my family that I have thus I can't find the time or energy to post.
It's been an exciting summer. We've been camping 5 times anywhere from Maggie Valley to Grandfather Mountain. We went to Disney World in early June. A belated gift for Patty that I had wanted to give her in December when she finished completely all of her treatments. Grant started kindergarten this year so we now have 3 in school and Patty just has Brett at home.
It looks like Patty is going to have a couple of follow-up surgeries this fall or winter. We're not sure yet when it will happen as we're waiting on some insurance issues. She is still have moderate issues with her lymphedema and her feet are really painful when she gets up from sitting or lying down. Both side effects from the breast cancer treatments.
I'm hoping to return to Haiti the week after Thanksgiving to serve at the girls orphanage our church now takes care of.
I hope to be posting more in the coming weeks and months.
God Bless
It's been an exciting summer. We've been camping 5 times anywhere from Maggie Valley to Grandfather Mountain. We went to Disney World in early June. A belated gift for Patty that I had wanted to give her in December when she finished completely all of her treatments. Grant started kindergarten this year so we now have 3 in school and Patty just has Brett at home.
It looks like Patty is going to have a couple of follow-up surgeries this fall or winter. We're not sure yet when it will happen as we're waiting on some insurance issues. She is still have moderate issues with her lymphedema and her feet are really painful when she gets up from sitting or lying down. Both side effects from the breast cancer treatments.
I'm hoping to return to Haiti the week after Thanksgiving to serve at the girls orphanage our church now takes care of.
I hope to be posting more in the coming weeks and months.
God Bless
Friday, April 04, 2008
Still Here!
We're all still here and Patty is doing ok. I haven't updated much as of late due to the increase in work demands. Since the merger of our health system with another my workload has about doubled but I still only have x amount of hours in the day to devote to it.
Patty went to the Thyroid doctor lately and everything seemed ok on that front. She still has the elbow pain which is most likely tendinitis. Her recent heart scan was ok as well. Her white count was a little low on her last visit so she is going to have to have that checked again soon I believe. The lymphedema is still there but in check for the most part.
Katie, our oldest, is getting Baptized this coming Sunday. It is really exciting and comforting to know that she is saved and wants to do this. Below is a recent pic of Patty and Katie for all of you who are still here reading! Oh, yea, Katie has had all of her hair cut off at her own request. Almost a foot!
Patty went to the Thyroid doctor lately and everything seemed ok on that front. She still has the elbow pain which is most likely tendinitis. Her recent heart scan was ok as well. Her white count was a little low on her last visit so she is going to have to have that checked again soon I believe. The lymphedema is still there but in check for the most part.
Katie, our oldest, is getting Baptized this coming Sunday. It is really exciting and comforting to know that she is saved and wants to do this. Below is a recent pic of Patty and Katie for all of you who are still here reading! Oh, yea, Katie has had all of her hair cut off at her own request. Almost a foot!
Saturday, March 08, 2008
Latest Update
I apologize again for the lack of updates. I guess its a sign we're reaching a mild form on normalcy if that is possible with 4 kids.
Patty's elbow is still bothering her. She'll probably have another bone scan in the next month or two to see if there is anything going on there. She had a B-12 shot on Thursday which has kept her blood counts high since her chemo finished. She has a MUGA scan scheduled for next week to check to see if all the chemo has had any lasting effect on her heart. She also has an ultrasound of her thyroid scheduled next week as well to make sure her thyroid is functioning as it should. Monday will be 19 months since this whole ordeal started. Seems like a lifetime. Please pray that her tests will be negative and that her elbow pain will improve.
Patty's elbow is still bothering her. She'll probably have another bone scan in the next month or two to see if there is anything going on there. She had a B-12 shot on Thursday which has kept her blood counts high since her chemo finished. She has a MUGA scan scheduled for next week to check to see if all the chemo has had any lasting effect on her heart. She also has an ultrasound of her thyroid scheduled next week as well to make sure her thyroid is functioning as it should. Monday will be 19 months since this whole ordeal started. Seems like a lifetime. Please pray that her tests will be negative and that her elbow pain will improve.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Elbow
Patty's elbow x-ray was normal but the pain persists. It most likely is some type of muscle or tendon issue.
We took a retreat this weekend with my cousin and his wife. This required us to spread the kids out among three close friends of ours. It was a great time except for the fact that it went by way too quickly.
With Patty's lymphedema appearing to be under control we'll probably start to look into her reconstruction options.
We took a retreat this weekend with my cousin and his wife. This required us to spread the kids out among three close friends of ours. It was a great time except for the fact that it went by way too quickly.
With Patty's lymphedema appearing to be under control we'll probably start to look into her reconstruction options.
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Check Up Today
Patty has a check up today with her Medical Oncologist (chemo doctor). She has been having a quite a bit of pain in her elbow of which I'm sure he is going to want to do tests on to see what is going on. It could be related to the lymphedema or something else. I will let you know after the check up. Until then pray that her elbow pain will improve. Outside of that she has been feeling pretty good and her hand and arm have had some improvement.
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Haiti - Day 1 - Leaving the Airport
Once we exited the airport doors I immediately knew that we were indeed in a 3rd world country. People everywhere grabbing at our luggage, shouting, disagreeing. Since I had never experienced an environment where people were shouting in a language I couldn't understand, it was a little disconcerting. I became further concerned when a guy grabbed the cart of luggage I was pushing that had my carry-on on it. I think he was just trying to get us out of there but at this point my trust level was running a little low. Finally, they got us to an area where our transportation was and begin loading our luggage into the truck. Confusion still reigned as we waited for Bryan and Pastor Juste's people to tell who was riding in which vehicle. Some were on the back of the luggage truck, some in a van (referrred to as the MiniBus), some in a SUV, and me, Mark Johnston, and Luke the missionary in a very small SUV pulling up the rear.
As we exited the airport lot it was now dark and I noticed two things, no lights and people freakin' everywhere! Truly, I'm not sure I can accurately describe it. Ladies walking with huge baskets on their heads, rubble everywhere, trucks (called tap-taps) were packed like sardines with people packed in the back some hanging off with one arm. They would be known as taxis in our world. Although nothing like we've every seen. Many of them are unbelievably decorated in colorful pictograms, flashing lights, and images from Jesus to women posing on Mercedes.
The car horn appears to be the Haiti national anthem as it is used early and often. There are seemingly no driving laws as its every man for himself. People are sitting out in the front of their shanties or business by candlelight selling what appears to be some type of fried meat. It looks like its been there a while. Huge vats of what appeared to be chicken or pork. My recurring thought was I hope the car doesn't stop.
Luke, a full-time missionary in Haiti had joined us at the airport for the trip and he was sitting in the back in between me and Mark Johnston. Our driver Rico is Pastor Juste's son. Our front seat passenger, thankfully, is a full blown member of the Haiti Elite National Police. He was decked out with your usual assortment of grenades, hand guns, and automatic rifles. I was very thankful he was riding in our car especially once the car did stop. He would get out and people would move out of the way and immediately the traffic would clear.
(to be continued in the next post)
As we exited the airport lot it was now dark and I noticed two things, no lights and people freakin' everywhere! Truly, I'm not sure I can accurately describe it. Ladies walking with huge baskets on their heads, rubble everywhere, trucks (called tap-taps) were packed like sardines with people packed in the back some hanging off with one arm. They would be known as taxis in our world. Although nothing like we've every seen. Many of them are unbelievably decorated in colorful pictograms, flashing lights, and images from Jesus to women posing on Mercedes.
The car horn appears to be the Haiti national anthem as it is used early and often. There are seemingly no driving laws as its every man for himself. People are sitting out in the front of their shanties or business by candlelight selling what appears to be some type of fried meat. It looks like its been there a while. Huge vats of what appeared to be chicken or pork. My recurring thought was I hope the car doesn't stop.
Luke, a full-time missionary in Haiti had joined us at the airport for the trip and he was sitting in the back in between me and Mark Johnston. Our driver Rico is Pastor Juste's son. Our front seat passenger, thankfully, is a full blown member of the Haiti Elite National Police. He was decked out with your usual assortment of grenades, hand guns, and automatic rifles. I was very thankful he was riding in our car especially once the car did stop. He would get out and people would move out of the way and immediately the traffic would clear.
(to be continued in the next post)
Sunday, January 27, 2008
The Latest
Patty went for her last arm treatment and then put the new sleeve and glove. It doesn't look too bad. The glove has actually helped with her fingers but her hand is still a little swollen. Her elbow is still sore and weak as well. We're not really sure what is going on with this but it has been going on for a while. I think when she goes back to the doctor in February they will maybe do a bone scan to make sure nothing is going on.
Meanwhile, the girls are selling girl scout cookies until this Thursday. If you want to buy any just send us an email and we'll get them to you when they come in. They're $3.50/box.
Bella is growing bigger and bigger and is still nipping at the kids' feet driving them crazy.
Meanwhile, the girls are selling girl scout cookies until this Thursday. If you want to buy any just send us an email and we'll get them to you when they come in. They're $3.50/box.
Bella is growing bigger and bigger and is still nipping at the kids' feet driving them crazy.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Quick Update
Sorry I haven't posted in over two weeks. Work, dealing with my dad's estate issues, more work, church, and family life I've been exhausted. I'm now responsible for 6 cancer centers throughout East Tennessee and before I had two. I'm trying learn as much as I can but that is taking time.
Meanwhile, Patty's treatments have done well except for her fingers. They have finally fitted her for a sleeve and we'll see how that goes when it comes in . She has about had it with the compression bandages. You know her she goes non-stop no matter what and she has been on a "Spring Cleaning" binge since Christmas. I'm praying for that to end ;).
I plan on continuing the Haiti journal as soon as I get some time to type it out. So keep checking!
Meanwhile, Patty's treatments have done well except for her fingers. They have finally fitted her for a sleeve and we'll see how that goes when it comes in . She has about had it with the compression bandages. You know her she goes non-stop no matter what and she has been on a "Spring Cleaning" binge since Christmas. I'm praying for that to end ;).
I plan on continuing the Haiti journal as soon as I get some time to type it out. So keep checking!
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Last Cancer Treatment
Tomorrow is Patty's last scheduled treatment for the breast cancer diagnosis she received on August 9, 2006. 1 Year, 4 months, and 18 days ago. To steal a phrase from a not so favorite president of mine, FDR, "...a day that will live in infamy." She will still continue receiving treatments for her arm but these are not technically treatments for cancer rather treatments for the side effects of the surgery.
Patty is in remission or as we say in the medical field NED (No Evidence of Disease). No one is officially cured of cancer, you either have it or are NED. We continue to pray that she will remain NED until she dies of something else at least at the age of her grandmother Bessie who turned 90 on Dec. 7. This has been a long road to travel and Patty and I are both praying for some green pasture. We need it.
Christmas has been a blur. The first few hours of Christmas morning were great spending time with the kids. It went downhill after that as I begin to drown in the excess of it as it all added up. It was a conflicting day for me. I thought of my friends in Haiti who it was most likely just another day trying to survive. I thought back to simpler times in America as I heard Patty's grandmother describe her Christmas's to me as a little girl in the 1920's where they got only a few pieces of fruit in their stocking. The only time they got fruit. And lastly, I longed for a more fulfilling Christmas like the one in an 1850 Christmas short story by Harriet Beecher Stowe I read before my grieving soul rested for the night.
A young lady complained about how she gave Christmas gifts to her friends and family that weren't really needed and was done more out of tradition then need and how she longed to give gifts that were truly embraced and needed. Her aunt told her of many people, mostly poor, who had needs and that gifts for those needs would be truly embraced. The young lady took this advice and begin to act upon it. This desire to fill real needs is my prayer for myself and for each of you for next Christmas. As Jesus said 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' May we all follow his wise advice.
God Bless.
Patty is in remission or as we say in the medical field NED (No Evidence of Disease). No one is officially cured of cancer, you either have it or are NED. We continue to pray that she will remain NED until she dies of something else at least at the age of her grandmother Bessie who turned 90 on Dec. 7. This has been a long road to travel and Patty and I are both praying for some green pasture. We need it.
Christmas has been a blur. The first few hours of Christmas morning were great spending time with the kids. It went downhill after that as I begin to drown in the excess of it as it all added up. It was a conflicting day for me. I thought of my friends in Haiti who it was most likely just another day trying to survive. I thought back to simpler times in America as I heard Patty's grandmother describe her Christmas's to me as a little girl in the 1920's where they got only a few pieces of fruit in their stocking. The only time they got fruit. And lastly, I longed for a more fulfilling Christmas like the one in an 1850 Christmas short story by Harriet Beecher Stowe I read before my grieving soul rested for the night.
A young lady complained about how she gave Christmas gifts to her friends and family that weren't really needed and was done more out of tradition then need and how she longed to give gifts that were truly embraced and needed. Her aunt told her of many people, mostly poor, who had needs and that gifts for those needs would be truly embraced. The young lady took this advice and begin to act upon it. This desire to fill real needs is my prayer for myself and for each of you for next Christmas. As Jesus said 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' May we all follow his wise advice.
God Bless.
Friday, December 21, 2007
Inspirational Verse of the Day
"He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted." Job 5:9
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Haiti - Day 1 - Travel Day
I have different sections of each day so I'll post a section at a time. I've also added in some thoughts here and there in parentheses to expand on what I had written at the time. I hope this gives you a better viewpoint of our experience in Haiti.
Day 1 - Travel Day
Leaving US, Arriving Ayiti (Haiti)
We left the church house @ 3:45 a.m. and headed to the airport. Scott Sparks drove the church van and the attached trailer. He looked like he hadn't been up at 3:45 a.m. in a long time, lol... We didn't have heat until Brian Lloyd broke out some type of pliers to turn the control over to warm. I should have known that this was a precursor of things to come from him in Haiti. At the airport we loaded up 26 people, 52 LARGE checked bags, and just as many carry-ons onto the plane. From there to Dallas, from Dallas to Miami (whose airport has a lot to live for), from Miami to Port-Au-Prince. I should have known when the plane took a tight 180 degree turn for landing and then landed hard and fast it would be an omen for the next few hours. We deboarded and headed for immigration where I met a missionary couple from Canada who was staying for three weeks.
(At the time, I thought I wish I could stay that long but I remembered that thought on the back of a covered open air truck for the ride back to the airport to head home and cringed at the thought of staying two more weeks. I couldn't do it emotionally. I was spent. Little did I know that my dad was going to die this day and the emotional rollercoster was waiting to take me for a few more rides against my will.)
Once through immigration we began gathering our bags. Unbelievably, all 52 made it. Unfortunately, one of the ladies in our group left her carry-on bag on the plane and the airport personnel would not allow her to retrieve it. She had a mild panic attack that was ultimately soothed by the bag's return through our persistent efforts. Strangely enough, while we were gathering bags, hunting bags, begging for a carry-on bag the few people that were left and the airport workers, in cognizant to us, stared at televisions in the baggage claim area at some soccer game being played in a far off land. It wasn't much different than if the NFL was on at an airport in the US.
Next: Leaving the Airport
Day 1 - Travel Day
Leaving US, Arriving Ayiti (Haiti)
We left the church house @ 3:45 a.m. and headed to the airport. Scott Sparks drove the church van and the attached trailer. He looked like he hadn't been up at 3:45 a.m. in a long time, lol... We didn't have heat until Brian Lloyd broke out some type of pliers to turn the control over to warm. I should have known that this was a precursor of things to come from him in Haiti. At the airport we loaded up 26 people, 52 LARGE checked bags, and just as many carry-ons onto the plane. From there to Dallas, from Dallas to Miami (whose airport has a lot to live for), from Miami to Port-Au-Prince. I should have known when the plane took a tight 180 degree turn for landing and then landed hard and fast it would be an omen for the next few hours. We deboarded and headed for immigration where I met a missionary couple from Canada who was staying for three weeks.
(At the time, I thought I wish I could stay that long but I remembered that thought on the back of a covered open air truck for the ride back to the airport to head home and cringed at the thought of staying two more weeks. I couldn't do it emotionally. I was spent. Little did I know that my dad was going to die this day and the emotional rollercoster was waiting to take me for a few more rides against my will.)
Once through immigration we began gathering our bags. Unbelievably, all 52 made it. Unfortunately, one of the ladies in our group left her carry-on bag on the plane and the airport personnel would not allow her to retrieve it. She had a mild panic attack that was ultimately soothed by the bag's return through our persistent efforts. Strangely enough, while we were gathering bags, hunting bags, begging for a carry-on bag the few people that were left and the airport workers, in cognizant to us, stared at televisions in the baggage claim area at some soccer game being played in a far off land. It wasn't much different than if the NFL was on at an airport in the US.
Next: Leaving the Airport
Monday, December 17, 2007
Still Recovering
What a two week period. If there is a list of troubled emotions I think I've felt them all over the last two weeks. Enough about me.
Patty is continuing to receive treatments for her arm three times a week. There has been some improvement which is a good sign. She keeps wanting to take the wraps off, she tends to be a non-compliant patient sometimes, but I reiterate to her that if she wants it to get better she has to keep it on.
She has two Herceptin treatments left. After these all of her treatments for the cancer are complete. Almost a year and a half. Combine this with my dad and its been an extremely tough period. We feel like we've worn everybody out with all the child care we've had to have for all of Patty's appointments. Unfortunately, this continues with the appointments for her arm. It may seem trivial but this is one of the things that grieves us is to have to continually ask for help. What makes it worse is we have four to care for! I digress.
I'm contemplating posting my journal entries from Haiti here if anyone is interested. Let me know.
Please continue to pray for Patty's arm, her mental health, and our family as a whole.
Patty is continuing to receive treatments for her arm three times a week. There has been some improvement which is a good sign. She keeps wanting to take the wraps off, she tends to be a non-compliant patient sometimes, but I reiterate to her that if she wants it to get better she has to keep it on.
She has two Herceptin treatments left. After these all of her treatments for the cancer are complete. Almost a year and a half. Combine this with my dad and its been an extremely tough period. We feel like we've worn everybody out with all the child care we've had to have for all of Patty's appointments. Unfortunately, this continues with the appointments for her arm. It may seem trivial but this is one of the things that grieves us is to have to continually ask for help. What makes it worse is we have four to care for! I digress.
I'm contemplating posting my journal entries from Haiti here if anyone is interested. Let me know.
Please continue to pray for Patty's arm, her mental health, and our family as a whole.
Sunday, December 09, 2007
Brief Update
I made it back from Haiti late Friday night. We found my dad dead at home on Saturday. After that trip and this I'm emotionally bankrupt. Keep up the prayers.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
3 Days Away
Three days from now I will be on a plane traveling to the mountains of the island nation of Haiti to serve and love on some of the poorest children in the world. Click HERE for a small snapshot of what we're serving. Some of have asked why?, there is plenty people that have needs here. The best answer I have heard is that there are plenty of people to help here, but there is no one to help down there. For me, our church has went twice before and each time they returned the Holy Spirit spoke to me that I should have went. Plus, everyone that has went has said its a humbling life changing experience. I want some of that. This week the enemy have been in full attack mode in attempting to keep me here. Let's hope he doesn't prevail.
Why Haiti? Among the many things they don't have, such as electricity or even a simple mirror to know what they look like, hope is one of the most lacking. As the Proverb says, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick" Myself and 25 others are going to hopefully "treat" their hearts by acting as the hands and feet of Jesus Christ. Part of that is by clothing, feeding, and teaching them. By us just being their they believe that God is blessing them.
Please pray for me and more importantly Patty as she has graciously allowed me to go despite having 4 children, daily treatments for her arm, and the stress and frustration that develops from both of those issues. Her and Katie will be traveling on Friday to North Carolina on Friday to perform the interpretive dance they did last year to the song "I Am" at her Aunt's Christmas tea. They will be traveling back on Sunday. Pray for her safe passage as well.
Her arm has stabilized under treatment and hopefully will begin to improve. Please pray for continued healing both physically and mentally for her with this and all other health issues. Also Grant is giving us a time. This is our first 4 year old boy and he is all boy. Pray for his obedience and our patience, lol...
This will probably be my last post before I return...Thanks to all of you who pray, help, or offer a kind word.
Why Haiti? Among the many things they don't have, such as electricity or even a simple mirror to know what they look like, hope is one of the most lacking. As the Proverb says, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick" Myself and 25 others are going to hopefully "treat" their hearts by acting as the hands and feet of Jesus Christ. Part of that is by clothing, feeding, and teaching them. By us just being their they believe that God is blessing them.
Please pray for me and more importantly Patty as she has graciously allowed me to go despite having 4 children, daily treatments for her arm, and the stress and frustration that develops from both of those issues. Her and Katie will be traveling on Friday to North Carolina on Friday to perform the interpretive dance they did last year to the song "I Am" at her Aunt's Christmas tea. They will be traveling back on Sunday. Pray for her safe passage as well.
Her arm has stabilized under treatment and hopefully will begin to improve. Please pray for continued healing both physically and mentally for her with this and all other health issues. Also Grant is giving us a time. This is our first 4 year old boy and he is all boy. Pray for his obedience and our patience, lol...
This will probably be my last post before I return...Thanks to all of you who pray, help, or offer a kind word.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
The Hits Keep a' Coming!
Patty's visit didn't go well. She received news she didn't want to hear. Basically, they bandaged her arm up to where she can hardly move it. She has to wear it like this for 4 weeks. After that she has to wear a compression glove and sleeve for the rest of her life. Additionally, she has to wrap her arm with bandages every night for the rest of her life and basically have limited use of this arm for the rest of her life. Looking at the situation you think 'ok, I can handle this if I just have to worry about myself but, when you have 4 kids under the age of 9 to care for it becomes quickly overwhelming.
I always thought due to Patty's mom having breast cancer in her 40's that she might have a chance of having it. But, I never ever imagined the scenario we're in. I thought since she was proactive in monitoring herself and getting mammograms and biopsies of anything suspicious if she did get it she would be in her 40's, the kids would more self sufficient, and it would be the earliest stage you could find and the treatments would be relatively benign. This scenario we find ourselves in is unbelievable. In her 30's, 4 small kids, lymph nodes, masectomies, chemo, herceptin, radiation, thyroid issues, tamoxifen, lymphedema, who knows what's next. This is in addition to the normal things that make daily life difficult like other family sickness, finances, obligations, appointments, 4 kid's activities, I could go on and on but basically you get the picture.
I think the devastating blow is that you hope to be done with the year and a half of cancer and its treatments only to discover the effects of it and its treatments are going to be a constant reminder, hindrance, and minute to minute frustration to the end of your days. The Proverb "Hope deferred makes the heart sick" is definitely true, ...definitely true. I think Patty and I feel like we're in a vice that keeps getting squeezed tighter. Sometimes I think if we "could" give up we would.
I've always been intrigued by patients in my experiences that didn't exhibit any "hope" despite good chances for cures. Now, I have a better idea why they may not have it. I've learned a lot from the patient side that will allow me to serve our patients better. The funny thing is I'm starting to wonder if I want to stay in it. I'm tired of cancer and its devastation. My life is Cancer. My family, my job, my thoughts.
I always thought due to Patty's mom having breast cancer in her 40's that she might have a chance of having it. But, I never ever imagined the scenario we're in. I thought since she was proactive in monitoring herself and getting mammograms and biopsies of anything suspicious if she did get it she would be in her 40's, the kids would more self sufficient, and it would be the earliest stage you could find and the treatments would be relatively benign. This scenario we find ourselves in is unbelievable. In her 30's, 4 small kids, lymph nodes, masectomies, chemo, herceptin, radiation, thyroid issues, tamoxifen, lymphedema, who knows what's next. This is in addition to the normal things that make daily life difficult like other family sickness, finances, obligations, appointments, 4 kid's activities, I could go on and on but basically you get the picture.
I think the devastating blow is that you hope to be done with the year and a half of cancer and its treatments only to discover the effects of it and its treatments are going to be a constant reminder, hindrance, and minute to minute frustration to the end of your days. The Proverb "Hope deferred makes the heart sick" is definitely true, ...definitely true. I think Patty and I feel like we're in a vice that keeps getting squeezed tighter. Sometimes I think if we "could" give up we would.
I've always been intrigued by patients in my experiences that didn't exhibit any "hope" despite good chances for cures. Now, I have a better idea why they may not have it. I've learned a lot from the patient side that will allow me to serve our patients better. The funny thing is I'm starting to wonder if I want to stay in it. I'm tired of cancer and its devastation. My life is Cancer. My family, my job, my thoughts.
What A Day
Wow. Yesterday was uhhhhh...trying. When I got home from work I discovered Patty had accidentally wrecked the van, Brett has pink eye in BOTH eyes, I needed to pick up all the Girl Scout nuts for delivery, Grant throws up in the van, and Kendall is saying her ear is really hurting. Oh yea, I led our Community Bible Study group in between. What a day!
Patty's appointment was just for measurements and teaching on exercises. She goes this morning for the therapy part of it. Pray it will begin to begin to help.
Patty's appointment was just for measurements and teaching on exercises. She goes this morning for the therapy part of it. Pray it will begin to begin to help.
Monday, November 19, 2007
The Latest
Patty's arm has steadily worsened. It is also very painful for her as of late. Of course, she has been pushing herself to the max. The Christmas Tea that she hosts annually for the church was this past Saturday. There were over 225 women in attendance. This year it was a fundraiser for our Haiti mission trip which I'll explain in another post. It looks like over 3k was raised. The work she puts into this I'm sure is a contributor of it getting worse.
Thankfully, she has an appointment with a Lymphedema Therapist today at 5. That being said, I'm requesting for supernatural healing as directed in John 14:14, "You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it." You can do the same!
We still struggling with the new dog name. These are the front runners.
Thankfully, she has an appointment with a Lymphedema Therapist today at 5. That being said, I'm requesting for supernatural healing as directed in John 14:14, "You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it." You can do the same!
We still struggling with the new dog name. These are the front runners.
Bella
Maggie
Presley
Maggie
Presley
Vote for your choice!
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Cancer Island
A reader of the blog that I've had the pleasure of exchanging emails with shared the following with me a few days ago and it rang so true for me I thought I would share it with everyone. The writer is another husband whose wife has faced breast cancer over the last year and he is writing in reference to my comments in another post about watching other's lives carrying on as normal while we're struggling to stay above water.
"We have called this being stranded on "Cancer Island ". I heard an interview from a cancer patient and he characterized it as living in a parallel universe in which those dealing with cancer can cross over to the world of their friends, but their friends can not cross into the cancer world. I thought that was a good way to describe it. I would add to this another dimension in which caregivers reside, hanging somewhere between the two. I think, at times, this can be the most lonely place to be."
Amen brother, Amen. This is the most short and concise description of how I, and we, feel that I've ever read.
I think the writer makes an astute observation in his last two sentences in the paragraph about caregivers. Don't take me wrong, I'm not groveling for more attention but, in the last few years studies have been conducted on caregivers of cancer patients and the results are eye opening concerning the physical and mental health of this population. Which brings up a point that I've mentioned before. Cancer doesn't just affect the individual family member, but the whole family as well. Including the physical and mental health of the family.
"We have called this being stranded on "Cancer Island ". I heard an interview from a cancer patient and he characterized it as living in a parallel universe in which those dealing with cancer can cross over to the world of their friends, but their friends can not cross into the cancer world. I thought that was a good way to describe it. I would add to this another dimension in which caregivers reside, hanging somewhere between the two. I think, at times, this can be the most lonely place to be."
Amen brother, Amen. This is the most short and concise description of how I, and we, feel that I've ever read.
I think the writer makes an astute observation in his last two sentences in the paragraph about caregivers. Don't take me wrong, I'm not groveling for more attention but, in the last few years studies have been conducted on caregivers of cancer patients and the results are eye opening concerning the physical and mental health of this population. Which brings up a point that I've mentioned before. Cancer doesn't just affect the individual family member, but the whole family as well. Including the physical and mental health of the family.
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
Arm Update
Patty saw an orthopedic surgeon yesterday to determine if the issues with her arm might be related to carpal tunnel syndrome. He was under the impression that it wasn't and that it was indeed lymphedema. We're trying to get her in to see somebody as soon as possible because with this problem you want to get treatment before it worsens. Unfortunately, our insurance provided treatment location has a several week delay so we're exploring other alternatives.
To counterbalance all the negativism in the air, I finally succumbed to the "Getting A Dog" barrage that I have been inflicted with for several months now. Its been tough but they've wore me down. I've been mentally tortured to bring me to this humble position so I digress.
If you remember, our last dog Chrissy had to be put to sleep not long after Patty's surgery. We drove out to Maryville on Sunday to look at a couple of West Highland White Terriers that were almost ready to be taken home. The place was a beautiful small farm (I'll confess, I was coveting) where the kids got to play with the pups in the grass. And by the way kids includes Patty. Although, the boys were more interested in an old toy pedal tractor and the wide expanse to drive it, push it, or fight over it than the dogs. Patty and Kendall decided on the girl and so we put a deposit down and will pick her up either this weekend or next whenever she's ready.
We're taking suggestions on names so post anything clever in the comments. Her dad's name is Elvis and the mother is Priscella. So that should give you a head start
To counterbalance all the negativism in the air, I finally succumbed to the "Getting A Dog" barrage that I have been inflicted with for several months now. Its been tough but they've wore me down. I've been mentally tortured to bring me to this humble position so I digress.
If you remember, our last dog Chrissy had to be put to sleep not long after Patty's surgery. We drove out to Maryville on Sunday to look at a couple of West Highland White Terriers that were almost ready to be taken home. The place was a beautiful small farm (I'll confess, I was coveting) where the kids got to play with the pups in the grass. And by the way kids includes Patty. Although, the boys were more interested in an old toy pedal tractor and the wide expanse to drive it, push it, or fight over it than the dogs. Patty and Kendall decided on the girl and so we put a deposit down and will pick her up either this weekend or next whenever she's ready.
We're taking suggestions on names so post anything clever in the comments. Her dad's name is Elvis and the mother is Priscella. So that should give you a head start
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